A picture of two people smiling like it’s the happiest day of their lives. What exactly is newsworthy about that? It’s the fact that the subjects of the picture just got a divorce. It’s called a ‘divorce selfie,’ and its another trend gone viral that’s caught the attention of the popular media. The old notion of a mean-spirited divorce followed by a lifetime of scorn, or perhaps indifference, is being turned on its head here in British Columbia and around the world.
Everyone knows that stress is unhealthy, so anything one can do to avoid it is a good thing. Stress is nearly impossible to eliminate in a divorce, but it may be possible to minimize it. Rather than choose a litigated divorce in a courtroom, with no quarter given and none asked, divorcing couples today can opt to settle their issues through mediation, or collaborative law. A non-confrontational divorce can lay the groundwork for a healthier post-divorce relationship. That should be of particular interest to divorcing parents of young children.
A 2008 study conducted by Ohio State University found that kids who live through a divorce filled with negativity a more than twice as likely to suffer financially and academically later in life, than kids whose parents separated on reasonable terms. Researchers in the field agree that children need support and stability from their parents to thrive. It is not the divorce that brings negativity into a child’s life; it is how their parents handle the divorce that can weigh heavily on a child.
Whether two people are parents or not, there may be many benefits to a low-conflict divorce, some mental and emotional, and some financial. While one still might not wish to snap a selfie after a divorce, it may still be possible to walk away from a marriage with mutual respect. If this sounds like a desirable kind of divorce, it might be time to speak with an experienced British Columbia lawyer.
Source: reportca.net, “Here’s what “divorce selfies” are teaching us about amicable breakups, coparenting”, June 6, 2017